Butler Cabin, Augusta National (c) Burgh Golfer

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Goofy Golf Gifts and Holiday Tradition

The holiday season is upon us and it is the time of year for holiday cheer, spending time with family and exchanging presents. 
It is also time for annual renewal of the goofy golf gift season.  That’s right, and every golfer out there has experienced this.  We have all been on the receiving end of some weird, obscure, off the wall golf gifts.  You know the drill, when well-intentioned friends and family feel the need to buy us golfers the one thing we must have.  The thing most golfers truly need is a five pack of lessons from their local golf professional.  Instead, we end up with Santa underwear, reindeer golf shoes, or exploding golf balls.
For those of us who have been playing golf for a long time, we usually experience this at least once a year.  Of course, when we open these gifts we act surprised, cheerful and excited.  But, in the back of our minds we are thinking “really, did someone actually pay for this?!?”
The goofy golf gifts I usually receive come in the form of decorations for the house, like statues of Santa golfing, signs that say “Oh Christmas Tee,” and miniature gilded golf shoes to hang on the tree.  I think to myself, “where am I going to put this?”  It usually ends up in my home office, which my wife has designated as the goofy golf gift zone. 
To think that there is actually a cottage industry for producing, marketing and selling this stuff.  I truly missed my calling in life.  To think that all this time I could have been selling golfing Santa ties or reindeer tees.  I even could have produced an infomercial to move the product to desperate, last minute shoppers.  We could have hired David Feherty as the spokesperson.  I can picture it now, Feherty on the Home Shopping Network hocking product to late night shoppers who can’t sleep and need to buy that one last gift.
Another holiday tradition I love is the holiday neighborhood golf clinic.  We have all seen our neighbors in their backyards swinging that new club or trying out the new swing aid that is going to fix all of those swing flaws (Ho, Ho, Ho).  They cannot wait to get out and try out the latest rescue club, sand wedge or putter that will change their game next season.  They have visions not of sugar plums dancing in their heads, but rather of long drives, birdies and eagles.  Of course, there are those true golfers who are never spotted outside swinging clubs in their winter coats because they have a hitting net in their basement or garage. 
Whatever you receive this holiday season, I hope you enjoy it.  After all, it is the thought that counts, right?  Or, for some members of my family, all that counts is the gift receipt.  I am sure you know what I am talking about, those sweet words of.  “It’s okay if you don’t like it, I saved the receipt.”
Have you ever received a goofy golf gift?  If so, Please share your goofy golf gift stories.

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